November 15, 2015
I got a rather odd comment this morning (or was it a compliment?). I was walking down the hall at church this morning wearing the above outfit. This friend turned to me and said, "Joanna, today you look particularly. . .tall."
Um. . .
Guys, this is NOT smooth. Don't say this. Especially with the pause. When in doubt, neutral comments are better not said. They are equal to negative comments. I felt bad for the guy though, so I took it like a statement of fact and went into the optical illusions of proportions and how different clothing choices make different body types look certain ways. It was actually only a 30 second schpeel, but just long enough to smooth the awkward comment into a mini conversation.
If you don't know what a neutral comment is, here is a crash course.
Negative: Those are weird shoes.
Neutral: You have new shoes.
Positive: Liking the shoes!
I'm not sure how this affects guys, but when you give a girl a neutral comment she will either seek clarification or put it in the negative pile. If you notice a girl's shoes and say "You have new shoes" she will do one of three things. (1) Try to find out what you actually think: "I do! What do you think?", (2) Become self-aware and think that you disapprove (actual reaction depends on the girl at this point), (3) be momentarily conflicted before distancing themselves from the issue and treating it like a fact. This includes an educational seminar like mine from earlier or straight contradiction of the statement.
So there you go, guys -- a little "intelligence for your life" as John Tesh would say. Go forth and be winsome.